


All In For You

by wonhyuk



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Drama, Eventual Smut, Lots of Angst, M/M, Romance, Wonhyuk - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-24
Updated: 2017-04-28
Packaged: 2018-10-23 14:28:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10721184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wonhyuk/pseuds/wonhyuk
Summary: The story, written in third-person, follows main character Shin Hoseok during a difficult time in his life. Struggling to stay alive, Hoseok lives his life from day-to-day, an outcast with a broken past and juvenile record. Basically living on the streets, his only true comfort comes from his friends who treat him as their leader. When his past comes back to haunt him in ways he can’t fully comprehend, only his closest friend has the capability to pull him back into reality.





	1. Chapter 1

Shin Hoseok wouldn’t want you calling his group of misfits a “gang.” Though they listened to him fervently, and took his assertions as if they were life-binding commands, he frowned at the thought of being a leader to anything so impulsively violent. He carried a gun on him, yes; a simple glock with average magazine capacity and small enough to be easily concealed, but the pistol was a worst-case-scenario option. Too often thugs were seen hanging around his “area,” but he simply knew it as his home. At first Hoseok paid no mind to the criminals but eventually the police were seen patrolling the street outside of his dwelling. Drug deals were probably going sour, and he didn’t want his residence exploited, so he took matters into his own hands.

He never had to fire the weapon; only uncover his pistol from the inside of his jacket and unclip the safety. Anyone could have resisted. Most of them were middle-aged men, but rung out on Meth and Ketamine and frightened that they would be turned into the authorities. Hoseok never had to do much; simply glare at them long enough until they ran away. He never understood why it was so easy, but it was better than any other option.

Hoseok’s home away from home was an abandoned apartment complex on the outskirts of Seoul, about an hour long subway ride from where he grew up. It stood beside a few other rundown buildings, most of which had been cleared out and scavenged, thus left in ruins. Over time, Hoseok managed to gather his own supplies into his dwelling; decor, as normal civilians called it. These decorations simply consisted of a simple bed and sheets, a couch that he’d found on a separate floor of the building, and a spare, old mattress that he kept on the floor. Anything else that was in his chosen apartment had already been left there previously.

He’d left his family years ago; his parents having divorced when he was young and he didn’t have any siblings. Often, he returned home to see his mother and paid for her rent whenever he could find work, but everyday was a struggle for them both. If it wasn’t for his friends he probably would have wound up in prison years ago.

His friends kept him in check. They made sure that his pistol never saw the light of day unless it was for an emergency. Hoseok always knew that he could be easily riled up, but he never had a temper. The only thing that ever made him angry was seeing his friends hurt, whether it was mental anguish or if someone had physically assaulted them. They never let him after their assailants though; they were adamant in making sure that their “leader” wouldn’t see an early grave.

“But how can you just let him step all over you like that? Hey, I’m talking to you!” Hoseok shouted, calling out to his friend who was nervously covering a swollen eye.

Another boy, Jooheon, stood between them, holding Hoseok’s shoulders as he tried to keep him still. “Wonho, c’mon man, calm down.”

“I told you to never call me that!” Hoseok exclaimed, trying to shove Jooheon away.

“You should listen to him,” Kihyun remarked, standing off to the side with his arms crossed over his chest.

Hoseok sighed loudly but motioned for his friend to let him go. “I’m okay, I’m okay.”

Jooheon cautiously loosened his grip and gave Hoseok a few pats on the shoulder. “See, he’s okay? You’re okay, right, Hyungwon?”

The taller, injured boy nodded as a bag of frozen rice cakes was placed on his face by a blonde-haired boy. “I’m fine, hyung. Really.”

Hoseok stomped over to Hyungwon, carefully examining his injury. The taller boy’s left eye was swollen shut, and his lip was cut and bruised.

“We should keep this on him to reduce the swelling,” the blonde one said, moving the frozen bag of food back over Hyungwon’s eye.

Hoseok stared at Minhyuk briefly and nodded without argument. “Hyungwon, take my bed. You should rest.”

“Thanks, hyung,” Hyungwon replied, letting himself be escorted into the side bedroom by the blonde.

“Take care of him, would you Minhyuk?” Hoseok added.

The blonde nodded and smiled simply before helping Hyungwon into the bedroom, an arm wrapped gingerly around him.

Hoseok and his friends were in his apartment, scattered about the living room with all of their eyes fixed on him. He sighed deeply and fell onto the couch, rubbing his eyes and smearing any makeup that had been there. He felt someone sit down beside him but didn’t move to look.

“Hyungwon needs to learn how to stand up for himself,” Hoseok said out loud.

“Hyung, you’re the one who always says that violence isn’t necessary,” someone remarked from the other side of the room.

“I know, but that’s not what I mean, Kihyun,” Hoseok replied, now looking around the room.

Changkyun, the youngest out of all of them, had decided to sit beside Hoseok. He sat back comfortably, a half-empty beer bottle in one hand, the other combing through his light brown hair.

“Don’t give me that look, Changkyun,” Hoseok remarked.

“What? I didn’t say anything, did I?” Changkyun replied, smiling slyly afterward.

“Not a word,” Jooheon added, also grinning.

“So, what are we going to do about the kid that beat him up?” Kihyun asked, his tone serious.

“We shouldn’t do anything,” Shownu interrupted from across the room, popping the cap off of his own beer.

“What do you mean, we shouldn’t do anything? This kid has been tormenting Hyungwon for weeks. How is he supposed to pass any of his classes this semester like this?”  Kihyun interjected, clearly agitated.

“Well, I ain’t killing him,” Changkyun replied, sipping his beer.

“No one’s killing anybody,” Hoseok said, rubbing his eyes again and growing tired of the banter.

“We should do something,” Kihyun replied.

“And what do you propose we do, Kihyun?” Hoseok asked, looking over at his younger friend.

Kihyun stood across the room, arms still crossed over his chest. Shownu stood behind him from inside the kitchen and raised an eyebrow, curiously awaiting his remark.

“We go after him! Get him to stop doing what he’s doing. Maybe scare him a bit,” Kihyun replied earnestly.

“Or kill him,” Changkyun added.

“Enough,” Hoseok sighed, glaring at Changkyun to inform him that he wasn’t joking.

“Hyungwon’s the only one here who’s doing something with his life. We can’t let him fail out of university because of this,” Kihyun exclaimed.

“I agree,” Hoseok replied in a sigh. “But it shouldn’t come to violence. I don’t want anyone else getting hurt.”

Kihyun nodded, happy that his bickering finally seemed to win Hoseok over.

“Then what should we do?” Jooheon asked, sitting on a broken coffee table in front of them. He sat forward, his arms resting on his knees as he twiddled his fingers. Hoseok could tell that he was concerned.

“I don’t know, I haven’t thought that far yet,” Hoseok replied bitterly, licking and then biting his lower lip as he tried to piece a plan together.

Minhyuk finally entered the room, watching the discussion from afar as he rested against the bedroom door frame. Hoseok looked up, meeting his eyes for a moment before Minhyuk decided to enter.

“He’s resting now,” Minhyuk announced, making his way over to the couch. Changkyun looked up at him momentarily before scooting over so that the blonde could sit between them.

“Thank you,” Hoseok replied, watching the other as he sat beside him.

Minhyuk nodded, making himself comfortable before sitting back and running his fingers through his yellow hair.

“Well, I should get going. I have a fight tomorrow and I should spend the rest of the night preparing,” Shownu stated, finishing the rest of his beer.

“Hyung, you know I’ll be there,” Jooheon replied, bumping his fist with Shownu’s as he passed by.

“Anyone else coming? I have a lot of bets going for me this time,” Shownu said.

“You know I don’t gamble,” Hoseok replied. “But good luck.”

Shownu nodded, grabbing his duffle bag from off of the floor and wrapped it over his shoulder. “What about the rest of you?”

Changkyun set his empty beer down and burped, winking over at Shownu jokingly. “You know it.”

“I’ll try to come, but you know I work late Saturday nights,” Kihyun replied. “I should get going too. Keep me posted on Hyungwon, will you, Minhyuk?”

Minhyuk nodded, “Of course.”

Kihyun walked out behind Shownu, closing the door behind the both of them. Hoseok could hear their footsteps grow quieter and quieter as they descended the stairs and exited the abandoned building.

Changkyun stretched out on the couch and set his legs onto the broken coffee table in front of them. “I thought Kihyun-hyung would never leave,” he announced nonchalantly.

Minhyuk tried to stop himself from laughing and nudged his friend. “You’re a horrible person.”

“I know,” Changkyun replied with a smirk on his face.

“You’re lucky Kihyun didn’t hear you,” Hoseok added, smiling lightly.

“Ah, he knows I hate his nagging. He’s worse than my own mother,” Changkyun replied, standing up and stretching. “Anyone want to go play billiards downtown?”

“I should probably stay and keep an eye on Hyungwon,” Minhyuk replied. “Maybe we can go tomorrow before Shownu-hyung’s fight?”

“I like your thinking,” Changkyun said with a smirk, patting Minhyuk’s face childishly before going to leave. “Jooheon?”

Jooheon stood, adjusting the cap on his head that was covering his red hair underneath. “Yeah, I’ll come for a bit. What about you, Hoseok?”

Hoseok shook his head, his eyes now closed, still contemplating on what to do about his injured friend. “No, go on without me. I’ll stay here with Minhyuk and Hyungwon.”

“Alright, just don’t do anything stupid while we’re gone,” Jooheon replied before joining Changkyun and leaving.

Hoseok sighed, his eyes still closed as he laid back on the couch, thinking of the best possible scenario for Hyungwon’s situation. Beating the perpetrator nearly to death wouldn’t work; he’d only come back again and with lackeys, and if no one was with Hyungwon when it happened… Hoseok didn’t want to think about what the end result might be.

“Why don’t I go to university with Hyungwon?” Minhyuk spoke aloud. “I know you’re busy thinking. It’s why you’re so quiet.”

“Mm,” Hoseok mumbled back. “You can’t go to university with Hyungwon. You’re not enrolled.”

“But I can go anyway. I’ll wait out by the park, or in the library.”

“And what if something happens to you too?” Hoseok asked, his eyes now open. “What will you do?”

Minhyuk frowned. “Defend myself, obviously, and stick up for my friend.”

Hoseok shook his head, “You’re so naive, Minhyuk, and headstrong. It’s what I like about you, but I can’t let you do that. You’ll get hurt.”

“You don’t think I can defend myself?” Minhyuk remarked, frowning.

Hoseok raised an eyebrow quizzically. “Can you?”

Abruptly, Minhyuk stood up and grabbed Hoseok’s wrist, motioning him to do so as well. “Fight me!”

Hoseok couldn’t stop himself from smirking. “What?”

“Punch me, do it! I’ve been watching Shownu-hyung at practice. He taught me a few things.”

“I’m not punching yo–” Hoseok started to reply, before Minhyuk unexpectedly darted forward and pushed his friend, attempting to rile him.

“I can defend myself,” Minhyuk said, fists now raised in front of him.

Had it been any other person shoving him, Hoseok would have been utterly offended, but he cocked his head side to side before smiling back at the blonde. “Okay then, let’s see what you’ve got.”

Hoseok smirked as he advanced on his skinnier opponent, not holding his fists up in front of him as Minhyuk was doing. He slightly crouched, as if hunting prey, moving from side to side as he toyed with the other.

Minhyuk scrunched his nose, concentrating, before lunging forward and attempting a punch to the side of Hoseok’s face. He had darted back before Hoseok could react, quick on his feet.

Hoseok went to grab him but Minhyuk jumped away, taking the opportunity to knee the larger boy in the stomach. Hoseok coughed and then groaned, trying to stop himself from falling over.

“Ah, shit! I didn’t mean to do it that hard! Are you okay?” Minhyuk exclaimed, hastily going to help his friend.

Doubled-over in fake pain, Hoseok grabbed Minhyuk by the arm when he was close enough and pulled him down into a headlock on the floor. With a strong arm wrapped around Minhyuk’s neck, the other in a vice-grip on his arm, there was no way the smaller boy would win.

“Do you give up?” Hoseok asked slyly.

Minhyuk hit the floor a few times in response that he had lost the fight, coughing lightly when Hoseok released his grip.

“Hyung, that wasn’t very fair,” he remarked, rubbing his neck.

Hoseok shrugged his shoulders, “You can’t always fight like you’re in a boxing ring.”

“Then will you teach me, like Shownu does?” Minhyuk asked, standing up.

Hoseok stood as well, looking the blonde over. “I don’t do that anymore.”

“C’mon, do I have to entice you again?” Minhyuk joked, holding his fists up in front of him and positioning himself in a readied stance.

“Maybe you should just let Shownu teach you,” Hoseok replied, not budging.

“Ah, c’mon,” Minhyuk teased, now lightly nudging Hoseok’s arm continuously.

Minhyuk smirked, walking around Hoseok as if in a waltz, pushing him here and there like a plaything. Hoseok watched him but didn’t move, curious but unwilling.

“Hyung, do I really have to beg you?” Minhyuk asked, giving Hoseok a rougher nudge. “I don’t like begging.”

Hoseok raised a brow but didn’t say anything and instead just watched the other, never taking his eyes off of him. Even as Minhyuk stepped out of his perspective, Hoseok still kept him in the corner of his eye, a light smirk playing across his lips. He licked his lips subconsciously, his gaze perhaps lingering longer than he realized.

Without notice, Hoseok advanced on Minhyuk, sending several punches in the other boy’s direction. Minhyuk quickly replied, ducking his head out of the way just in time. He sent his own back at Hoseok, of which were blocked and then Hoseok stepped back.

“I know that you can do better than this,” Minhyuk said. “I’ve seen you fight before.”

“That was years ago, Minhyuk,” Hoseok replied as they circled each other.

“Fight me like you would then,” Minhyuk stated. “Fight me like how Wonho-hyung would.”

Hoseok’s nose immediately scrunched up and he frowned. “You know I don’t like being called that.”

“Being called what? Your name?”

“You know what,” Hoseok retorted.

“Oh, you mean Wonho,” Minhyuk replied, pressing him. “Well, Wonho wouldn’t hesitate to fight me.”

“I told you to stop it,” Hoseok said sternly, continuing to circle the other.

Minhyuk smirked lightly, continuing to antagonize him. “Fight me, Wonho. Fight me like you would in the ring, unless you’re not strong enough.”

Hoseok narrowed his eyes, having a difficult time stopping himself from letting out an annoyed growl. “You don’t want to do this, Minhyuk.”

“Try me,” the blonde replied, before winking and saying, “Wonho.”

Hoseok was on him before Minhyuk even had the time to register what was happening. The blonde had just enough time to brace himself before he was thrown onto the hard floor, and Minhyuk was scrambling to get out of his grip.

The smaller boy managed to roll away from Hoseok and was about to stand onto his feet before Hoseok grabbed him by the ankle and pulled him back down. In only a few seconds Hoseok had Minhyuk pinned onto the floor, not in a chokehold but instead was straddling him, holding the blonde’s hands up over his head. Hoseok used his free hand to press down onto his chest before moving up to his neck, choking him slightly.

Minhyuk grimaced and attempted to kick free, but Hoseok only tightened his grip. He choked, trying to take in air, his chest feeling like it was going to cave in with the larger boy sitting on top of him.

“Hyung, please,” Minhyuk managed to croak out, tears welling in his eyes.

It took a few moments for Hoseok to register what was happening and he immediately loosened his grip after realizing. Minhyuk coughed roughly, sucking sweet oxygen back into his lungs.

Hoseok let Minhyuk’s hands go free and moved off of him, staring off in a daze. It took Minhyuk a few minutes to pull himself back together, rubbing away any stray tears from his eyes before glancing at his friend. Hoseok was sitting silently on the floor, his shoulders slouched and his eyes glazed over.

“Hyung? Hyung!” Minhyuk moved over to him and touched his shoulder, shaking him a little. 

The blonde was surprised to see tears in the other’s eyes, but before Minhyuk could react, Hoseok finally stood and promptly left the room.


	2. Chapter 2

A cold shower would have been the most opportune thing to do in Hoseok’s current situation, in order to wash away the guilt he felt for assaulting his friend in such a way. Though, because the apartment complex was in shambles, the faucets only worked on occasion. Hoseok had locked himself in the bathroom, refusing to look at himself in the mirror as he turned on the sink faucet. Nothing.

Groaning, he sat on the toilet seat with his head in his hands, wondering why he had committed such a horrendous act.

“Hyung? Hyung, are you okay?”

Hoseok could hear Minhyuk knocking on the other side of the door but he didn’t answer. After a few moments he heard the other walk away when he didn’t reply.

Hoseok rubbed his temples and then ran his fingers through his black hair, wanting to hit himself for what he’d done. He was sobbing now, trying his best not to be heard, but his chest was heaving uncontrollably and he was forced to cover his mouth.

He’d never attacked anyone like that in such a manner in years. After he’d left home he was forced to make money somehow, never having been able to find work due to his juvenile record. He’d sneak into gyms late at night to work out and relieve his stress, finding the release of endorphins a much better coping mechanism than any sort of drug. Unfortunately he got caught one night but wasn’t apprehended for it. Instead, the man who found him offered him a chance to use his skills in the fighting ring and make money from it.

The thoughts of his old days–of Wonho–made Hoseok slam his fist on his thigh in agitation. Not wanting to dwell on the matter anymore, he did his best to gather himself and wipe away his tears on his shirt.

After about an hour had passed Hoseok finally emerged from the bathroom and immediately went to grab himself a beer from the kitchen. Minhyuk wasn’t in the living room so he must have been in the bedroom with Hyungwon, tending to their injured friend.

Hoseok silently cursed at himself again for what he’d done to Minhyuk, his friend who he’d known for over six years. Minhyuk had always been there when Hoseok needed him; always by his side like a sibling, but they had a bond even stronger than that. When anyone in their group was having a bad day Minhyuk would cheer them up; he was always laughing and smiling about something, with a stupid grin plastered on his face. Even though Minhyuk had a family and could leave any time that he wanted, he chose to stay with his friends. It was as if it was his goal to try to make someone’s day a little brighter and a little less painful.

Hoseok took a long swig of his beer before making his way into the bedroom to see how his friends were doing. Minhyuk was sitting on the edge of the bed beside Hyungwon, dabbing his forehead with a cloth. Hyungwon was awake, although looked very tired, and looked up at Hoseok with a small smile.

“What happened out there?” Hyungwon asked, looking at Minhyuk and then over at Hoseok.

“It was nothing, Hyungwon. How are you feeling? That’s more important.” Hoseok asked, his brows furrowing in concern.

“I’m fine, my head just hurts,” Hyungwon replied.

“It’s stopped bleeding, that’s good,” Minhyuk said, removing the cloth. “I hope you don’t have a concussion.”

“I’m fine, hyungs. Really,” Hyungwon attested.

“Maybe we should take you home?” Hoseok asked.

“No! Please, I can’t go home like this,” Hyungwon exclaimed. “Can I stay here for the weekend? I’ll tell my parents I’m staying with a friend from university or something.”

Hoseok frowned but didn’t want to fight with him. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yes, I swear,” Hyungwon replied, already taking out his phone to text his family.

“I’m glad you don’t need stitches,” Minhyuk remarked, standing from the bed. “I’ll go wash this.”

“The water’s not working right now,” Hoseok stated, carefully taking the bloodied cloth from Minhyuk.

“Hyungwon, would you mind if I talked to Minhyuk alone? You should rest,” Hoseok asked.

“Yeah, I’ll shout if my head explodes or something,” Hyungwon added, trying to be humorous, but no one laughed.

Minhyuk followed Hoseok out of the room, the older taking another swig of beer. Hoseok set the bottle down and motioned for Minhyuk to sit by him if he was willing.

“Minhyuk, look–”

“Hyung, it’s okay,” Minhyuk interjected, a sincere smile on his lips. “I shouldn’t have angered you like that. It’s my fault.”

“No, it’s not,” Hoseok retorted with a sigh. “It’s not your fault at all. I shouldn’t have done that to you. I don’t know what came over me.”

“But I asked you to. I know what could’ve happened. You know I’ve seen you in the ring,” Minhyuk said.

“It doesn’t matter,” Hoseok replied, his head now in his hands. “I had no right to do that to you. I feel horrible. I can’t even look at myself.”

Minhyuk grabbed Hoseok by the shoulders, making him sit upright. Tears were again falling down Hoseok’s cheeks, his eyes red from having cried so much already. With a sleeve, Minhyuk began wiping Hoseok’s tears off of his face and a soft smile formed on his lips when he’d finished.

“You didn’t hurt me, hyung. You have no reason to cry,” Minhyuk said, lightly rubbing Hoseok’s shoulder in attempt to comfort him.

Hoseok could barely bring himself to look Minhyuk in the eyes because he felt so ashamed. Looking down, he sniffed and wiped his nose, feeling disgusted with himself.

“Hyung, look at me,” Minhyuk commanded.

When Hoseok refused to Minhyuk did it himself, holding the older boy’s chin in his hand.  “See? I’m alright. You don’t have to be upset.”

“That still doesn’t make it okay for what I did,” Hoseok replied.

“How about we call it even?” Minhyuk asked, rubbing the side of Hoseok’s cheek with his thumb.

Hoseok sighed, still feeling uneasy, but nodded silently.

Minhyuk smiled and pulled Hoseok in for a hug, resting his head comfortably on the older boy’s shoulder. Hoseok wasn’t surprised by this, because for as long as he’d known Minhyuk, he never seemed to have learned anything about personal space. Which was fine–over time, he and the rest of their group became acclimated to it. Often he’d feel Minhyuk walk up from behind him and wrap his arms around his waist, laying his head against Hoseok’s back. He did this with all of their friends, of course, but for some reason the blonde seemed to enjoy teasing Hoseok the most. He’d blow in Hoseok’s ear or bite his bicep when the elder’s arms were exposed, making Hoseok let out a surprised howl. For the most part Hoseok considered that Minhyuk did it out of amusement, until one instance when Hoseok woke up with Minhyuk sleeping beside him, the blonde’s arm draped around his torso. Although curious, Hoseok never did anything about it and promptly fell back to sleep.

He enjoyed the hug for as long as it lasted, letting his eyes close momentarily before Minhyuk finally pulled away.

“I think I’m going to stay the weekend since Hyungwon will be here, and I’d feel better watching over him,” Minhyuk stated.

“You know I can watch him,” Hoseok remarked.

“I know, but you don’t have the magic touch,” Minhyuk replied, jokingly winking.

“What do you mean by that? I’ve been hurt plenty of times and I took care of myself.”

Minhyuk sighed and stood up, laughing. “I’m going to take the mattress on the floor, unless you’d prefer it?”

Hoseok raised an eyebrow, looking over at the dirty mattress in the corner of the living room. “I’ve been meaning to get a new one,” he cursed, subconsciously licking his lips as he thought it over. “You take the couch. I’ll take the mattress.”

“It’s fine, hyung. Changkyun slept on it last time he stayed over.”

“That’s exactly why I don’t want you sleeping on it,” Hoseok replied, laughing. “He puked on the floor, remember? Who knows what else he could’ve done.”

Minhyuk covered his face, unable to hold in laughter. “Ah, you’re gross!”

Hoseok smiled lightly and shook his head. “I’ll go get you a blanket.”

Hoseok returned with a blanket from his bedroom, having checked on Hyungwon and scolded him for not being asleep yet. He handed it to Minhyuk before sitting down and taking another sip from his beer, finishing the bottle.

“Hyung, you’re not really going to sleep on that thing, are you?” Minhyuk asked, making an appalled face.

Hoseok stood and stretched, his stomach sticking out as his white shirt lifted slightly. “Ah, I’ll be fine. Do you want a beer?”

Minhyuk shook his head before Hoseok went to grab another for himself, flicking off the bottle cap into the kitchen sink.

“Will you go to Shownu-hyung’s fight tomorrow?” Minhyuk asked as Hoseok sat back down beside him.

“Ah, I don’t know,” Hoseok replied, fiddling with the beer bottle.

“I know how it makes you feel. You shouldn’t feel bad about going.”

“It’s not that,” Hoseok replied, taking a swig. “Just, bad memories.”

Minhyuk nodded but didn’t reply, not wanting to push the matter. He started to make himself more comfortable, removing his shoes and setting them aside. He was dressed in a high-necked sweater and jeans, both of which he didn’t remove. Instead, he pulled the blanket up over himself, settling in.

“I’ll leave you to it,” Hoseok said, standing.

Minhyuk speedily grabbed Hoseok’s wrist, looking up at him. “Hyung, please don’t sleep there. There’s plenty of room on the couch.”

Hoseok looked at the mattress on the floor and then back at Minhyuk, unable to come to a decision. Minhyuk seemed to do it for him, sighing before he hastily pulled Hoseok back down. The older boy still hadn’t said anything, gingerly sipping from his drink as he looked at his friend.

Minhyuk moved down on the couch to make room, pulling the blanket with him. Hoseok finished his beer and ran a hand through his hair before removing his own shoes and leather jacket. Looking at his dirtied shirt that was covered in his tears and snot,  he sighed in annoyance before pulling it off over his head and making his way back to the bedroom to grab a new one.

Not wanting to turn the light on and disturb his sleeping friend, Hoseok carefully made his way through his room in attempt to find a clean shirt. While doing so he slammed his bare foot against a leg of the bed frame, immediately trying not to scream as pain spasmed through his foot. He took a few moments to recuperate before limping back out of the room, having only been able to pick another dirty shirt off of the floor.

“Are you okay?” Minhyuk asked, sitting up concerned.

“Yeah, fine,” Hoseok groaned, now sitting down and rubbing his injury. “I just stubbed my toe.”

“Want me to look at it?”

“No, I’ll be fine,” Hoseok replied, still groaning as he rubbed his toes.

Thankfully his foot hadn’t been cut or bruised, and after a few moments Hoseok carefully set his foot down with a sigh. He sniffed the shirt he’d brought out with him and made a face afterward, tossing it back in the direction it came. Hoseok didn’t mind sleeping shirtless; he had enough self confidence in himself to not be bothered by it. He often slept naked as well, but only when he was alone.

He looked back over at Minhyuk, who promptly set his gaze in a different direction.

“You’re a mess, hyung,” he remarked, looking back at Hoseok with a brow raised.

Hoseok smiled cheesily. “Yeah, I know. Go to sleep already.”

“Maybe if you’d stop making so much noise,” Minhyuk replied in a laugh, laying down.

The older shook his head, moving onto the other side of the couch. Having given his extra blanket to Minhyuk, and with Hyungwon using his bed, Hoseok wasn’t left with many options for himself. Now bare chested, he grabbed his jacket from off of the floor and used it to cover himself after he laid down.

“I can share the blanket, hyung,” Minhyuk remarked, one eye open as he looked over at Hoseok.

“Just go to sleep, Minhyuk,” Hoseok retorted, stubbornly refusing.

Fixing himself, Hoseok finally found a somewhat comfortable position to sleep in, although Minhyuk’s feet were pushing into his side. He felt Minhyuk teasingly jab him with his toe and Hoseok grunted in response. Trying to ignore it, he pulled his jacket up over his shoulder and rested his head, attempting to find sleep.

Hoseok wasn’t sure what time it was when he woke up, feeling someone push him over and sit down beside him. Minhyuk sat down next to Hoseok, pulling the blanket over the both of them.

“Mm, what are you doing?” Hoseok groaned, half asleep. He went to sit up but Minhyuk had already made himself comfortable in front of him, preventing him from doing so.

“You were shivering so much in your sleep that I couldn’t fall asleep,” Minhyuk replied, adjusting himself so that he wasn’t falling off of the couch.

Hoseok thought that he wanted to laugh but made a displeased face instead, “You’re squishing me.”

“Well, there isn’t much room so you’re just going to have to deal with it,” Minhyuk replied as he laid down, his back pressing against Wonho’s chest.

“Alright,” Hoseok mumbled, yawning unconcerned.

Minhyuk sighed, closing his eyes as he attempted to fall back to sleep. Semi-conscious, Hoseok wrapped an arm around the blonde and pulled him closer, the warmth helping his shivering subside.

“Mm, thank you,” Hoseok mumbled against Minhyuk’s back before falling into a deep sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

Hoseok woke up before Minhyuk did, the light of the day shining through the cracked and broken windows of his apartment. He yawned and opened his eyes, squinting down at Minhyuk whose head was pressed against his chest and his arm wrapped around Hoseok’s waist. Trying to get his bearings, Hoseok glanced around the room, relieved that Hyungwon was still asleep. Although being so close to Minhyuk wasn’t a strange occurrence, Hoseok wasn’t sure how it would look if someone walked in on them.

Hoseok let his head rest back down on the couch, not wanting to move too much and wake his sleeping friend. At first he did want to wake him; concerned if Hyungwon were to wake up or if their friends decided to pay a visit, even so early in the day. But his worries became less and less as he laid there, listening to Minhyuk’s rhythmic breathing against his chest. He watched the younger boy inquisitively, the pale yellow locks of his hair in disarray from a night of sleeping. Carefully, he pushed Minhyuk’s bangs away from his eyes and hastily lowered his arm when he realized what he was doing. Hoseok subconsciously licked his lips and then sighed, closing his eyes briefly and trying to wrap his thoughts together.

Minhyuk fidgeted in his sleep, pulling himself closer to Hoseok with the arm that was wrapped around him. Hoseok raised a brow as he looked down at him, unable to prevent a laugh from escaping his lips as Minhyuk started to drool on his bare chest.

The blonde immediately started to stir, now awake.

“Ah, sorry,” Hoseok apologized, unable to hide his smile.

“What time is it?” Minhyuk grumbled, his eyes still closed.

“I don’t know, I haven’t checked. You kind of got me trapped here,” Hoseok replied.

Minhyuk stretched his legs and slowly opened his eyes, rubbing them tiredly. Still not realizing the position he’d put himself in he yawned and stretched again, before finally sitting up. Hoseok couldn’t help but smirk as Minhyuk looked down at him, watching the initial shock set in.

“You drooled on me,” Hoseok stated, trying to sound angry but it amused him too much.

Minhyuk was awake now but hadn’t said anything. Instead, he used his shirt sleeve to wipe the drool that had pooled on Hoseok’s naked torso. Perhaps he was embarrassed, but Hoseok wasn’t sure if it was from where he woke up, or the drool.

“Sorry,” Minhyuk said, yawning nonchalantly.

Hoseok looked up at Minhyuk curiously but didn’t say anything. Instead, he sat up as well, scratching the back of his head.

“I should see how Hyungwon is doing,” Minhyuk said, his eyes still tired.

Hoseok gave a small nod. “That’s a good idea.”

Minhyuk smiled lightly and left the room, checking on their younger friend.

Hoseok stood and stretched, raising his arms up above his head and yawned. His muscles tightened as he did so, a tattoo visible on the back of his left shoulder. Scratching his stomach, he made his way over to the bathroom, praying that the water would be working. He walked past the bedroom door on the way, peeking his head in to see how Hyungwon was doing. The youngest of them was still visibly asleep with Minhyuk attentively watching over him. Minhyuk looked over when Hoseok paused in the doorframe, his eyes lingering on him for a few moments before he quickly looked away.

Hoseok bathed and dressed, relieved that the water in his apartment was running today, despite it being cold. He was just happy that it was working and not coming out dirty, as it sometimes did. He changed into a new pair of tight fitting jeans and t-shirt, as well as dark combat boots and his leather jacket.  By the time he’d finished Hyungwon was awake and chatting with Minhyuk in the living room, the bruising more prevalent on his face but not as swollen.

“How are you feeling?” Hoseok asked, concerned.

“Better than yesterday,” Hyungwon replied, lightly touching his face.

“We could still take you to a hospital,” Minhyuk interjected, also worried.

“The both of you need to stop worrying so much, I’m okay,” Hyungwon replied earnestly. “I’m actually thinking about going to Shownu’s fight tonight.”

“You seriously can’t be thinking that,” Hoseok replied.

“I am; I want to go,” Hyungwon said.

“Are you sure you’re up for it?” Minhyuk asked.

Hyungwon nodded. “I’ll be fine.”

Hoseok sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. Attending Shownu’s fight was the last thing he wanted to do, even though he already felt terrible for not supporting their eldest friend. If anything happened to Hyungwon when he wasn’t there, that guilt would only pile on top of itself. “Well, if you’re going then I guess I will too,” he announced.

“You will?” Minhyuk asked, surprised.

“Hyung, you don’t have to. Shownu hyung understands why you don’t go to his fights,” Hyungwon said.

“Yeah but if you have a concussion and end up on the floor unconscious, I’ll only end up with myself to blame for not being there,” Hoseok replied.

Hyungwon wanted to argue but Minhyuk touched his shoulder, making him stop. “It will be fun,” he added, smiling lightly.

Hyungwon smiled back at Minhyuk, despite any pain he might have been feeling. Hoseok rolled his eyes but went along with it, spending the rest of the early afternoon chatting with his friends.

Changkyun and Jooheon arrived in the early evening, eager to spend the night out. Jooheon immediately asked Hyungwon how he was feeling, carefully inspecting his bruised face. Hyungwon pretended to hiss in pain when Jooheon touched his cheek, and the red-head shrieked loudly, afraid that he’d hurt him. Hyungwon and Minhyuk laughed hysterically and Jooheon clutched his chest as he regained composure.

“Hyung, how are you really feeling?” Changkyun asked while Jooheon was still reeling from his trivial ordeal.

“I’m fine Changkyun, thanks for asking,” Hyungwon replied, hugging his friend in greeting.

“Why did you scare me like that?” Jooheon asked, sighing.

“Because it’s funny,” Hyungwon replied simply.

Changkyun slapped Hyungwon’s back a few times, both of them laughing. Jooheon shook his head and fixed the cap on his head, anxious to get going.

“Hoseok-hyung is coming too,” Hyungwon announced as they were preparing to leave.

Jooheon made a surprised sound, actually shocked. Changkyun grinned from ear-to-ear and embraced Hoseok, laughing afterward.

“Well, let’s go!” Jooheon exclaimed, the first of them out of the door.

They all spent the evening playing billiards and drinking before Shownu’s fight. Kihyun eventually met with them, half of them already drunk on a few rounds of Soju. With the alcohol numbing any pain that Hyungwon might have been feeling, he screamed with excitement after winning against Jooheon, raising his fists in the air and shouting.

“Ah, my ears,” Jooheon complained, covering the sides of his face.

Hyungwon laughed, clearly proud of himself.

“How much have you all been drinking?” Kihyun asked, more curious than concerned.

“Ah, hyung don’t start,” Changkyun replied, very tipsy.

“Start what?” Kihyun asked, looking around at his friends. “What did I do?”

Hyungwon and Minhyuk laughed at Kihyun’s response, greeting their friend as Kihyun stood dumbfounded. Hoseok stood the furthest from them, carefully sipping a beer. He was barely even tipsy but was not planning on being intoxicated if he had to babysit Hyungwon all night.

He caught Minhyuk’s eye as the blonde looked over at him, smiling slyly. Hoseok took another swig of beer, trying to interpret what it could’ve meant. It wasn’t Minhyuk’s usual smile. He had two smiles: his first smile was very soft, his teeth barely passing his lips. His second was when he was laughing; he would squint and have wrinkles in the corners of his eyes, beaming from head to toe. This was completely different; almost coy.

Hoseok nearly choked on his beer when the thought of Minhyuk flirting with him popped inside his brain. It would make sense–he’d been doing it all night without him necessarily piecing it together. It was only now that Hoseok remembered all of it: the light touches on his shoulders and waist–leaning up behind from him to whisper in his ear–asking him if he wanted a drink–unknowingly touching his thigh when they had been sitting down–looking at Hoseok and biting his lip after he’d taken a shot–laughing at literally anything he said…

Hoseok shook his head, knowing that Minhyuk was quite drunk and that would explain his behavior. No one else seemed to pay any mind, and he convinced himself that he was getting worked up for no reason. He finished his beer just as everyone had decided to leave so that they wouldn’t be late for Shownu’s fight. Hoseok paid for his drink and followed behind, laughing when Changkyun nearly tripped over himself as they made their way outside.

Although off the beaten track, their destination wasn’t far from where they were. Since the kind of fighting that Shownu participated in was illegal, the match would take place in a secreted basement of a club in Itaewon that Hoseok knew all too well. Having fought in the same place himself several times before, he could hear the familiar music blaring from the club many minutes before they arrived.

They entered from a back area that was hidden in an alley and were escorted down a flight of stairs, music bouncing off of the walls as they made their way down. Music was playing loudly in the basement as well, a DJ spinning in the corner and hundreds of spectators already crowded around a ring in the middle of the room.

Hoseok made his way to the front of their group and led his friends through the crowd of people, heading in the direction of where Shownu was waiting in the ring. Although the music was giving him a headache, Hoseok ignored it, continuously looking over at Hyungwon to make sure that he was okay.

“Hyung! Shownu-hyung!” Hyungwon shouted several times at his friend, waving his hand in the air.

Shownu looked over, smiling and waving back. Since it was probably impossible to hear him he didn’t try to reply, but the expression on his face wasn’t anything less than happy and grateful.

“I bet almost 60-thousand won on Shownu-hyung tonight,” Changkyun exclaimed so that everyone would hear.

“No, you didn’t,” Kihyun replied, stunned.

“Of course I did, Shownu-hyung’s going to win!” Changkyun asserted proudly.

Kihyun shook his head in disbelief and Jooheon clapped Changkyun’s back, laughing. Hoseok felt as Kihyun did, but wasn’t in the mood to be scolding anybody, especially when everyone seemed to be in good spirits.

“I hope hyung will be okay,” Minhyuk said, having walked over beside Hoseok. He spoke loud enough so only that he could hear.

“He will be, don’t worry,” Hoseok replied.

Minhyuk gently smiled but didn’t reply as the lights dimmed and the crowd started shouting. Hoseok’s friends joined in the chants, and he found himself cheering with them when Shownu’s name was announced. After both of the competitors were called, Shownu’s rival didn’t hesitate to get started, and the fight began.

“The winner! Shownu!” the MC declared, gripping Shownu’s wrist and holding his arm up in the air.

The fight had lasted long but Shownu was indeed the victor with bloodied fists to prove it. He held his hands in the air and yelled at the crowd, people responding back with screams of their own. Changkyun embraced Jooheon after he’d won, almost in tears from the excitement of winning his bet. They all shouted and celebrated together, jumping up and down as Shownu gave them a triumphant shout from inside the ring.

When they calmed down, Hoseok watched as Shownu exited the ring on the opposite side, likely going to the back area which housed a makeshift locker room.

“I’m going to congratulate him,” Hyungwon announced, already trying to make his way out of the crowd.

“I’ll go with you!” Minhyuk responded, already following behind his taller, brown-haired friend.

Hoseok went to follow but couldn’t keep up with them, the crowd already beginning to disperse and moving in all different directions. Instead, he made his way back over to the others, Changkyun pocketing his prize money with a big grin on his face.

“Hyung fought really well, don’t you think?” Kihyun asked.

Hoseok knew that Kihyun knew how he felt about fighting, as they were all familiar with his past. Trying to keep a straight face, he replied, “Yes, he fought very well.”

“I swear I thought I heard a snapping sound when Shownu-hyung kicked him in the ribs,” Jooheon exclaimed, still taken aback.

“There are no rules here, so anything can happen,” Hoseok replied, not sounding overly excited about it.

Still amazed from the fight, Jooheon, Changkyun, and Kihyun talked fervently while they waited for the rest of the group to return. After more than enough time had passed, Hoseok looked around, growing worried.

“Where are they?” he mumbled, now separating himself from the group.

With the basement now less crowded, Hoseok was easily able to make his way across the floor and into the room where he expected the others to be. Bewildered, no one was in the locker area, and he returned to his friends even more concerned.

“They’re not back there,” he announced, almost in a panic.

The others stopped their conversation, looking toward Hoseok with worried faces.

“Maybe they’re outside?” Kihyun asked, taking out his phone to text them.

Without replying, Hoseok immediately turned and started for the exit. He walked quickly, practically flying up the stairs before making his way outside. Although he knew that no harm could come to his friends if Shownu was with them, something didn’t feel right.

He pushed the exit door open and rapidly started looking around, hoping that they would be there so that he could stop making such a scene.

“Shownu? Minhyuk?” he shouted, looking around the alley.

“Hyung?”

Hoseok turned in a blink of an eye, his stomach twisting in knots when he saw who was speaking to him. Minhyuk was lying on the ground clutching his side, his face bleeding. He coughed a few times as Hoseok ran over to him and fell to his knees. Hoseok carefully pushed Minhyuk’s bloodied blonde hair away from his face, which was covered in bruises and a deep cut on his cheek.

“What happened?” Hoseok asked, his voice shaking.

Minhyuk tried to sit up and groaned when he attempted to. Hoseok attentively helped him, letting Minhyuk lean on him for support.

“They tried to attack Hyungwon but Shownu-hyung chased them off. One of them stayed behind and went after me,” he replied, spitting blood on the ground.

Hoseok wiped some of the blood off of Minhyuk’s lips with his thumb and then delicately inspected his face. The cut on Minhyuk’s cheek wouldn’t stop bleeding so Hoseok ripped off a piece of his shirt to use as cloth and began pressing it to the blonde’s face.

“Are you hurt anywhere else?” Hoseok asked.

“My side. He kicked me,” Minhyuk replied.

Hoseok cursed out loud, infuriated. “Let me see.”

Minhyuk hissed as he started to lift his shirt so Hoseok stopped him and made him hold the cloth himself. Using both hands he carefully lifted Minhyuk’s shirt, his face flushing in anger when he saw the horrible bruising on the side of Minhyuk’s torso.

“Do you think you can stand?” Hoseok asked, lowering Minhyuk’s shirt back down.

“I can try,” the blonde replied, already attempting to do so.

Hoseok helped his friend up with Minhyuk’s arm wrapped around his shoulder. Although groaning in discomfort, Minhyuk stood, trying to put on a brave face.

“We need to take you to a hospital,” Hoseok said.

Before Minhyuk could argue with him a figure emerged from the other side of the alley, walking questionably toward the pair.

“Hyung, that’s him,” Minhyuk said, his eyes wide with panic.

Hoseok looked at Minhyuk and then back at his assailant, anger suddenly boiling within him. “Stay here,” he said, removing Minhyuk’s arm from around his neck.

“Hyung, don’t,” Minhyuk attested, but Hoseok was already walking toward him.

“Hey! You’ve got some nerve coming back here,” Hoseok exclaimed, his hands balled into tight rage-filled fists.

The man paused momentarily, looking Hoseok over. Not feeling overly threatened, he stood more casually and made no attempt to flee. He wore a black mask over his nose and mouth so Hoseok couldn’t make out his face, but he assumed that he was probably the person who beat up Hyungwon, or one of his associates.

“Just dropped my watch while I was taking care of your friend over there,” he replied nonchalantly.

By this time Hoseok was seeing red, and it was taking all of his strength not to lunge at the attacker. The others finally made their way outside of the building; Kihyun, Jooheon, and Changkyun rushing to Minhyuk when they saw him.

“You came back for your watch? Are you stupid or insane?” Hoseok asked, his voice rising. “What gave you the right to lay a finger on him?”

“Perhaps both? It’s an expensive watch,” the thug replied. “We had to send your friends a message somehow.”

As Hoseok was about to lunge toward him he felt hands pull him back in place. Jooheon and Changkyun were holding onto him, preventing him from doing so.

“Hyung, it’s not worth it,” Kihyun said from behind them, Minhyuk leaning on him for support.

The thug laughed and that was all Hoseok needed in order to pull away from his friends and run toward him like an animal chasing prey. He threw his whole body at him, shoving the thug onto the ground so that he landed on his back with Hoseok on top of him. Hoseok hadn’t even thought about going for his glock even if he had it, as he’d left it back at his apartment. Instinct seemed to course through him like adrenaline, and he threw punch after punch at the attacker’s face, beating him until blood speckled the pavement.

It was Shownu who ended up pulling Hoseok off of the man, throwing him back against the alley wall and holding him there until he’d calm down.

“Hoseok! Hoseok stop!” Shownu exclaimed, trying to talk his friend down.

Hoseok hadn’t realized that he had been screaming. His pupils were dilated and filled with tears as he looked at Shownu who still had a firm grip on Hoseok’s shoulders, keeping him in place.

Hoseok was shaking, coming down from whatever it had been that had taken over him. Most of it was anger and adrenaline, but something else had stirred within him. Whatever it was made him think of nothing else but causing harm to the person who’d hurt his friend. _Minhyuk_.

Shownu finally let go of Hoseok but stayed close, unsure of his current state of mind. Hoseok wasn’t looking up, tears staining his cheeks and his mind an empty abyss but filled to the brim with too many emotions to count.

Hyungwon had returned at the same time as Shownu, helping Kihyun hold Minhyuk. Jooheon was standing behind Shownu, cautiously watching, while Changkyun checked to see if the unconscious thug still had a pulse.

“He’s alive,” Changkyun said.

Before anyone could reply Hoseok pushed away from Shownu and started walking down  the alley, not wanting anyone to see him in his current state. He didn’t know what to make of his emotions, and he never thought he’d ever reveal that side of himself again. It was as if _Wonho_ had returned from the ring, but worse; much worse. He was afraid that it wasn’t at the fault of his past–that he only had his _present_ self to blame, and that made him walk away even faster. 

He wanted to hide his shame; run as far away as possible, because Minhyuk would never look at him the same way again.


	4. Chapter 4

No one attempted to follow him. Hoseok wasn’t sure how long he’d been walking. It could have been minutes or several hours; he’d lost track of time as he trudged further and further away from his friends and the thug that he’d nearly beaten to death.

He couldn’t go back to his apartment. That would be the first place they’d look to find him. He couldn’t go see his mother either–he hadn’t a steady income in quite some time and had nothing to give back to her if she offered to take him in for the time being. Impulse caused him to venture to the only place he ever seemed to gain any sort of self-control and peace of mind; the gym.

Picking the lock on the back door, Hoseok entered without much difficulty and made his way inside. It was well past midnight and no one was working, but he kept his guard up just in case, practically tip-toeing through the facility. When he finally found what he was looking for he removed his shirt and jacket and wrapped his hands in bandages that he knew were stored away. After the bandages were fastened he approached a punching bag that was secured from the ceiling and began hitting it, letting out all of the fury that was still trapped inside of him from earlier. He sent several jabs and blows in different directions, timing each punch perfectly so that the bag held no resistance. When he wasn’t hitting it with his fists he was sending several strikes with his feet and knees, punching and kicking until he was bathed in sweat. In his last rush of adrenaline he shouted and smacked the punching bag, hurting his fist in the process but he didn’t register any pain. He leaned onto it, trying hard to hold back any tears–too tired from having cried so much the day before.

“You’ll only hurt yourself if you keep at it like that,” Shownu said.

Hoseok turned to the voice, seeing his eldest friend standing in the far corner of the room. Shownu approached him, watching Hoseok from the other side of the punching bag.

“I don’t care,” Hoseok replied, looking away.

Shownu shook his head. “Let me see your hand.”

“It’s nothing,” Hoseok replied, moving away. He had in fact injured his hand in the process, blood seeping through the bandages on his knuckles.

“Minhyuk’s okay. We took him to a hospital,” Shownu stated. “He’s worried about you.”

“He shouldn’t be,” Hoseok replied, almost wanting to chuckle.

“We’re _all_ worried about you,” Shownu remarked.

“I could’ve killed him, Shownu. I nearly killed a man,” Hoseok said. “I’ve had a rough life, I get that. I’ve been through Hell and back. I’ve knocked so many men unconscious in the ring that I’ve lost count, but never in my life has anything like that ever happened.”

“You were protecting your friend.”

“It wasn’t that,” Hoseok replied, his voice trembling. “I don’t know what it was.”

Shownu placed a hand on Hoseok’s shoulder, getting the other’s attention. “I’ve seen you fight and that’s what it was. It was self defense.”

Hoseok was shaking his head, still not convinced. “I don’t know. I don’t know anymore.”

Shownu embraced him before Hoseok could argue, holding onto him and patting his back. It wasn’t like how Minhyuk hugged him; Shownu was much larger, with broad shoulders and arms that seemed like they could squeeze the life out of him if he wanted to. Although he meant well it didn’t seem to ease any of Hoseok’s distress, but he mumbled a thank you nonetheless.

“They should be releasing Minhyuk tonight.  Thankfully he didn’t get any serious injuries,” Shownu said, letting go of Hoseok.

“What about the others?”

“Jooheon and Changkyun are with him. Kihyun and Hyungwon are back at your apartment.”

Hoseok sighed deeply and ran a hand through his hair. “Why are they there?”

“I told you; they’re worried about you,” Shownu replied.

“How can they be worried after what I did? They should be afraid,” Hoseok retorted, removing the bandages from his hands. He inspected the cuts that now adorned his right fist, using the bandages to wipe any blood away.

Shownu laughed lightly. “No one is afraid of you. They care about you is all.”

Hoseok shook his head, not understanding any of it. He couldn’t comprehend why anyone would still want to be associated with him after what he did. He didn’t live an easy life and they understood that. He had to fight to stay alive, just as Shownu was doing now, and he’d had some alarming encounters with criminals before. But he’d never sink so low as to kill someone, even if his own life was on the line. In that moment in the alley he hadn’t been concerned about his own well being–the thug could have easily concealed a weapon in his clothing and used it long before Hoseok attacked. It was seeing Minhyuk in such a horrid state that triggered something within him–watching as he lay almost motionless on the ground and afraid that he’d been dead. He hadn’t been thinking when he attacked the man; something almost feral had consumed him.

Hoseok shook the thought away, not wanting to work himself into such an emotional state again. “How did you find me here?”

“I followed you,” Shownu replied, smiling lightly. “C’mon, we should get going.”

“Shownu, I’m not going with you,” Hoseok replied, pulling his shirt back on over his head.

“No one’s mad at you, they’re just worried about you,” Shownu said. “You’re our leader and they look up to you. How do you think it’s going to make them feel if you don’t show up?”

“I don’t know why you all call me that,” Hoseok replied, putting his jacket on. “I’m no leader and this isn’t some kind of gang.”

“You already know why we do,” Shownu remarked.

“Maybe you should lead them then,” Hoseok retorted.

Shownu gripped Hoseok by the shoulders, looking directly into his eyes. “Stop this already. Take a few deep breaths and let’s get out of here.”

Hoseok couldn’t escape Shownu’s grasp even if he wanted to, so he didn’t try to fight. Instead he let out a sigh, rubbing the back of his neck while he thought it over. “Alright, fine.”

With a pleased smile on his face, Shownu released him and clapped him on the back. Reluctantly, Hoseok followed his hyung, taking deep breaths as he’d suggested as they made their way back to his apartment.

When they returned Kihyun and Hyungwon were settled on the couch, chatting over a video playing on Kihyun’s cellphone. After Hoseok entered they immediately quieted and watched them, obviously unsure what to say or do. Shownu had bought a six pack while they were out and opened a beer, making himself comfortable on the couch beside them.

“How’s Minhyuk?” Hoseok asked.

“He’s fine, I just talked to him,” Kihyun replied. “They should be coming back soon.”

Hoseok nodded but didn’t reply.

“How are you feeling?” Hyungwon asked.

“I don’t know,” Hoseok replied.

Hoseok helped himself to one of the beers, sitting on the floor opposite of them. He popped the cap and took a long swig, debating on how to approach the current situation. Thinking over what had happened, he wondered if Hyungwon was okay, as Minhyuk had said that he’d been the one they targeted. “Minhyuk told me that they went after you, Hyungwon. Are you alright?” he asked.

“Shownu chased them off before they could do anything,” Hyungwon replied. “But I didn’t know that one of them stayed behind. I followed Shownu and we were a block away when it happened. I–” Hyungwon’s voice broke off and he looked away from the others, trying to compose himself.

Shownu rubbed Hyungwon’s shoulder, trying to comfort him. “It wasn’t your fault.”

“Of course it was. It was the same kid who attacked me at university,” Hyungwon replied.

“No, it wasn’t,” Hoseok attested. “It wasn’t anyone’s fault.”

Hyungwon didn’t argue, staying silent. The room was quiet; the only audible sounds coming from cars passing by outside and a door opening on the bottom floor of the building.

“Sounds like they’re here,” Kihyun announced, getting up and going to the door.

Jooheon and Changkyun entered followed by Minhyuk who was now able to stand on his own. Despite this, Changkyun kept a close eye on him, a hand gently pressed against his back as they made their way inside the apartment. Shownu got up from the couch to make room for Minhyuk, going to help him but Minhyuk refused any assistance.

“I’m fine, hyung,” Minhyuk attested, carefully sitting down. “It’s really not that bad.”

Hoseok was now standing, still situated on the far side of the room. His eyes had widened after seeing Minhyuk, who now had stitches and a bandage applied on the side of his upper left cheek. He wanted nothing more than to approach him and make sure that he was okay, but his feet were firmly glued to the floor, too nervous to move.

It was Kihyun who sat down beside Minhyuk and inspected his bandages, asking him several times if he was okay. Minhyuk smiled softly, assuring his friend that everything was alright.

“They gave me painkillers, I’ll be fine,” Minhyuk said, pulling a pill bottle out from his pocket and shaking it. “Plus, Hyungwon looks a lot worse.”

“Thanks, hyung,” Hyungwon replied, laughing lightly.

Hoseok was watching him, subconsciously biting on his bottom lip. Minhyuk finally looked over in his direction and made eye contact with him, and it took all of Hoseok’s resolve not to run away.

“Minhyuk, I’m sorry,” was all that came out from between Hoseok’s lips, his voice wavering. “If only I’d been there–”

“Hyung, it’s not your fault,” Minhyuk interjected. “Stop blaming yourself for everything. There was no way we could’ve known what was going to happen.”

“That’s not the point!” Hoseok replied, his voice rising.

The apartment had become incredibly quiet. Shownu kept a watchful eye on Hoseok but didn’t approach him. Jooheon and Changkyun looked at each other and Kihyun let out a deep sigh.

“Hyung, then what _is_ the point?” Kihyun asked.

“Don’t push him,” Jooheon mumbled a reply, almost in warning.

“What?” Kihyun added, his voice now raised. “Even if Hoseok hadn’t been there you know we would’ve done something. We wouldn’t just stand idly. That’s not who we are.”

“If Hoseok hadn’t done it you know I would’ve,” Changkyun replied.

“Enough! We’re not criminals! We’re not thugs and we’re certainly not killers,” Hoseok exclaimed, the room quieting again. “What I did wasn’t okay. I don’t think that I can ever look at myself the same way again. Just because I did it does not give any of you the excuse to do so.”

Hoseok’s hands were balled into fists, his face flush with anger and an affluence of other turbulent emotions. He took a few deep breaths, calming himself before continuing. “If you want to live like that then fine, I don’t care, but you’ll have to leave then.”

“We’re not leaving you, hyung,” Minhyuk replied.

“No one is leaving,” Shownu asserted.

Everyone looked around the room at each other, seeming to be in agreement. Hoseok closed his eyes and rubbed his temples, questioning so many things but voicing none. Sighing, he finished the rest of his beer before saying, “I need to think,” and made his way to the bedroom.


	5. Chapter 5

Hoseok laid down on his bed, rubbing his eyes as he felt a headache coming on. Grabbing a pillow he covered his face with it, wanting to scream but his friends were all still gathered in the living room so he decided  against it. He knew that it was childish of him to leave the conversation so abruptly, but if he hadn’t he wasn’t certain what he would’ve done. Kihyun knew how to press his buttons, and Changkyun, the youngest out of all of them, never seemed to think before he spoke. None of them knew what they were really risking by saying such things, but Hoseok was finished arguing for the night. More than anything he wanted to leave his apartment but Shownu would probably try to stop him, if not follow him wherever he went. **  
**

Time passed and Hoseok heard the door of his apartment open and close several times but he didn’t keep track of who was coming or going. He drifted in and out of sleep, unable to fall into a deep slumber as horrible dreams consumed him. He woke up in a sweat, sitting upright in a panic and about to scream until Minhyuk took hold of him, bringing him back to reality.

“Hyung, it’s okay. It was just a dream,” Minhyuk said calmly, gently touching Hoseok’s shoulder.

Hoseok was breathing quickly and it took him a moment to collect himself. He took a few deep breaths and closed his eyes before replying, “Why are you still here?”

“I can’t go home looking like this,” Minhyuk said casually and shrugged.

“What about Hyungwon?” Hoseok asked, wiping sweat from his forehead.

“Hyungwon left with Kihyun. He’ll keep an eye on him, don’t worry,” Minhyuk replied.

“And everyone else?”

“They left.”

Hoseok sighed deeply, “You shouldn’t be here.”

“Where else am I going to go, hyung?” Minhyuk retorted, now sitting beside Hoseok. “You know how my father is. He’d take one look at me and laugh, probably lecture me in one of his drunken stuptors and add another bruise to my face.”

Hoseok frowned, regretful for having said anything. “I’m sorry.”

Minhyuk shook his head, “It’s fine. You had me so worried anyway, I had to make sure you were okay.”

Minhyuk had brought a damp towel with him and began wiping the sweat from Hoseok’s face. Hoseok didn’t move to stop him as Minhyuk would have done it whether he liked it or not.

“ _I_ should be the one taking care of _you_ ,” Hoseok said.

Minhyuk pushed Hoseok’s dark hair away from his forehead and began dabbing his skin with the towel. “I’m fine, don’t worry. I’ll take a painkiller if anything starts to hurt.”

“You should be resting,” Hoseok argued, grasping Minhyuk’s wrist. He lowered Minhyuk’s hand away from his face and took the damp towel despite the look of annoyance on the blonde’s features. “I don’t know why you treat me like this, Minhyuk. I don’t deserve any of it.”

Minhyuk rolled his eyes. “Will you stop with that already? No one is judging you.”

“But what I did was–”

“An accident,” Minhyuk interrupted. He paused, looking away. “If you hadn’t come back, hyung, I don’t know what would’ve happened to me.”

Hoseok didn’t want to imagine it–he didn’t want to imagine any of it. Instinctively he grabbed Minhyuk’s hand, just to hold onto it, to make sure that he was still there–that he was still okay and alive. Feeling the warmth on Minhyuk’s skin brought a sense of calmness, and any panicked thoughts that had began to spasm inside Hoseok’s skull quickly dispersed.

Though he’d only been holding Minhyuk’s hand for a few seconds he promptly let go and stood from the bed, feeling both embarrassed and confused. “I, uh, I need some air.”

Hurriedly, Hoseok removed himself from his apartment but didn’t venture too far. There was a balcony in an apartment on the floor above where he occasionally spent his time, more often than not to smoke cigarettes and clear his head. Once there he leaned against the railing and ran a hand through his hair, letting out a long breath. Although he told himself he’d quit smoking months ago he’d hidden a pack away specifically for moments like this and stuck a cigarette between his lips. With ease he lit it with a match and watched the tip of the cigarette ignite as he inhaled, sharp but sweet nicotine filling his lungs. He coughed a few times, having not smoked in quite some time, and quickly turned his head when he heard footsteps approach him.

“I thought you quit,” Minhyuk said, walking up beside him.

“Yeah, I did too,” Hoseok replied, taking another puff.

He looked down at the buildings and streets below, listening to the low drone of the city beyond. It was chilly and a light wind caused goosebumps to crawl on Hoseok’s skin whenever it passed, but he ignored it.

“You should go back inside, it’s cold out,” Hoseok said.

“I don’t mind,” Minhyuk replied.

Hoseok looked over at him, slightly raising a brow. “I’m not giving you any.”

“I didn’t ask,” Minhyuk replied in a light smirk.

Hoseok smiled softly and Minhyuk didn’t question him as he finished his cigarette, thoughts racing through his head. Despite removing himself from the situation the cigarette didn’t help to ease his thoughts, nor did Minhyuk’s presence. Putting the butt of the cigarette out on the railing he sighed, pocketing the pack of smokes in his pants. He looked over at Minhyuk who’d also been leaning on the railing, his arms wrapped around himself from the cold.

“C’mon, let’s get inside,” Hoseok said.

Minhyuk nodded, his arms wrapped around his chest. He had changed out of the sweater he’d been wearing before and opted for a light shirt instead, which didn’t protect him as efficiently from the cold. Hoseok followed him inside and they made their way back down to his apartment.

“If you’re staying then you take the bed tonight,” Hoseok said, shutting the door behind him.

“I’ll be fine on the couch, hyung,” Minhyuk replied, taking the blanket he’d used the night previously and wrapped it around himself.

“I won’t allow it. You need a decent sleep,” Hoseok retorted.

Minhyuk made himself comfortable on the couch and looked up at his hyung, refusing to move. “If you want me on the bed then you’ll have to move me yourself,” he said, stubbornly.

Hoseok crossed his arms across his chest, staring down at Minhyuk with a furrowed brow. “If it weren’t for your condition I’d throw you there.”

Minhyuk wanted to argue, a determined pout on his lips, but he knew better than to further cause injury to himself. With a sigh he stood up, blanket still wrapped around him, and lumbered into the bedroom with Hoseok following behind. Hoseok pulled the blanket back on the opposite side of the mattress and helped Minhyuk get in, who’d been struggling due to the pain in his side. Minhyuk grunted lightly as he sat down, leaning back against the headboard and sighed.

“Are you alright?” Hoseok asked, concerned.

“Maybe I should take one of those painkillers,” Minhyuk replied. He pulled the pill bottle out from his pocket and popped open the lid. “Do you have any water?”

Hoseok quickly left and returned with a bottle of water, happy that he’d stored some away for himself. Even if the water in the apartment was running, he didn’t dare attempt to drink any of it. He handed the water bottle to Minhyuk who swallowed one of the pills and then settled into bed.

“Sorry I can’t help with much else. Get some sleep,” Hoseok said, about to leave.

Minhyuk hurriedly grabbed Hoseok’s wrist, causing him to stop. “Can you stay with me?”

Hoseok looked down at the hand that was holding him and then back at Minhyuk, clueless as to what he could provide that would help the blonde in any way. “Would you feel better if I did?”

Minhyuk nodded, letting go of Hoseok’s wrist. Rubbing the back of his neck, Hoseok made his way to the other side of the bed and removed his boots and leather jacket before crawling on top of the mattress. The bed was full sized and large enough to fit them both, but Hoseok kept to one side in order to give his friend enough space.

“Better?” Hoseok asked, laying flat on his back with a hand behind his head.

“You don’t look that comfortable, hyung,” Minhyuk replied.

Hoseok rolled his eyes before closing them and replying, “I’m fine.”

Minhyuk grabbed the pillow that was behind him and moved over to Hoseok, nudging his shoulder in order to get him to lift his head.

“I said I’m fine, Minhyuk,” Hoseok retorted.

Not wanting to agitate him, Minhyuk put the pillow back behind him and made himself comfortable under the blankets. Hoseok, on the other hand, stayed where he was on top of the comforter and on the other side of the bed.

“Goodnight, hyung,” Minhyuk said.

“Get some sleep, Minhyuk,” Hoseok replied.

Hoseok didn’t sleep well. Again, he was afflicted with nightmares, tossing and turning in bed and mumbling in his sleep. He couldn’t remember what exactly he’d been dreaming about when he finally woke up, his eyes opening in shock as he felt a warm hand press against his face.

“Hyung, it’s okay, it’s me,” Minhyuk said, cradling Hoseok’s face against his hand.

It took Hoseok a few seconds to register that he was no longer dreaming, looking up at the blonde with wide-eyes. “What happened?”

“I think you were having another nightmare,” Minhyuk replied. He pushed Hoseok’s bangs away from his face, wiping sweat from his forehead. “You’re covered in sweat, and you’re freezing.”

Hoseok sat up and tried to catch his breath, goosebumps crawling on his skin as he remembered what he’d been dreaming about before Minhyuk had woken him.

“You should get warm,” Minhyuk said, making room in the bed.

Hoseok wiped his face with his shirt, trying to shake off the memory of the nightmare. It had been like a perfect imitation of when he’d first seen Minhyuk lying bloodied in the alley, only his dream had twisted it in such a horrific way that Minhyuk had no longer been breathing. “I’ll be okay, Minhyuk,” he replied, still recuperating.  

“Hyung, don’t start with me,” Minhyuk replied, sternly.

Hoseok looked over at Minhyuk who had a serious look on his face. Having no strength to fight with his friend’s stubbornness he got under the blankets, stifling a shiver as he did so.

Although Hosoek hadn’t noticed, Minhyuk rolled his eyes before moving over to his hyung and positioning himself next to him. Without asking, he moved Hoseok’s arm and made himself comfortable against his side, wrapping an arm around his torso.

Hoseok wanted to question it but was still so distracted from the nightmare that having Minhyuk close helped to calm him down. He felt the weight of Minhyuk against his chest and could smell the sweet scent from his blonde hair, having him so close. Hoseok couldn’t determine if he smelled more like honey or vanilla, or even the light aftertaste of lavender. Whatever the aroma, it helped Hoseok to relax, and he momentarily let himself feel at ease before he realized the situation he was in.

“Minhyuk, you don’t have to lay on me like this,” Hoseok said, his throat suddenly dry.

“You’re freezing, hyung. I don’t mind,” Minhyuk replied, his face still pressed against Hoseok’s chest.

Hoseok swallowed. “Are you sure?”

“Mhmm,” Minhyuk replied. “Unless you don’t want me to?”

Minhyuk sat up, leaning over Hoseok as he looked down at him. Hoseok felt his face get warm and broke eye contact, subconsciously licking his lips as he did so. “No, it’s fine.”

“You don’t look fine,” Minhyuk replied. “Your face is all red.”

Hoseok groaned in reply, immediately trying to roll away because he didn’t know what to say. Minhyuk tried to stop him and laughed, Hoseok making his embarrassment quite obvious.

“Hyung, talk to me. What’s wrong?” Minhyuk asked, attempting to roll Hoseok back toward himself.

Hoseok grunted again in response, trying to roll onto his stomach and bury his face in the mattress. He didn’t know how to explain what he was thinking or how he was feeling. He wasn’t quite sure what to make of any of it, only that when Minhyuk was around him he felt in the simplest of terms: happy. How was he supposed to form that feeling into words? Especially to someone who might not understand?

After Minhyuk failed to roll him forward he started poking and tickling him, making Hoseok laugh. Hoseok tried to squirm away but Minhyuk was swift and managed to sit on top of him as he tickled his hyung’s sides.

“Okay, okay! I give up!” Hoseok laughted, now on his stomach with his face against the mattress.

“Will you tell me what’s going on?” Minhyuk asked teasingly, sitting on Hoseok’s back.

“Yeah, if you stop tickling me,” Hoseok replied, catching his breath.

Minhyuk moved off of Hoseok so that he could turn around, the elder running a nervous hand through his hair. “I don’t know how to explain it,” he said, biting his lip.

“Did I do something wrong?” Minhyuk questioned.

“No, no. You didn’t do anything wrong,” Hoseok retorted. “You could never do anything wrong.” Hoseok refused to look Minhyuk in the eyes, too nervous to see his reaction as he continued, “You make me feel things, Minhyuk. Things I can’t quite explain.”

Minhyuk furrowed his brow curiously. “Maybe you could describe it?”

Hoseok sighed and sat up straight, fiddling with a lock of his hair. “I don’t know, maybe?” he paused, anxiously licking his lips. “You make me feel happy. You make me feel calm, too. Like, nothing else in the world matters when it’s just me and you. I don’t have to be worried about anything. I’m the happiest I could be,” he paused, nervously licking his lips again. “But when I saw you in the alley something took over me. It was like I wasn’t even there. I was so damn worried that something had happened to you that I didn’t even care about my own well being.”

Hoseok had raised his hands as he was trying to describe what he was feeling, chuckling when he realized how silly he probably looked. “Sorry, I’m not making any sense. I, uh–”

Hoseok was cut off from speaking as he felt Minhyuk’s lips against his own, his breath hitching in his throat from the momentary shock. It took him a moment to actually close his eyes; still stunned from feeling his friend’s lips against his. Although it had been brief, Hoseok felt like the kiss had lasted minutes before Minhyuk finally pulled away, leaving Hoseok bewildered and flushed. Minhyuk licked his lips and sat back, curiously watching his hyung as Hoseok attempted to process what had happened.

“Sorry, I thought maybe that might help,” Minhyuk said, nervously looking away. “I’ll go–”

Before Minhyuk could leave Hoseok abruptly grabbed him and pulled him back, crashing his lips into Minhyuk’s and kissing him without a second thought. He didn’t want to think about it; over thinking only seemed to cause more confusion and Hoseok still couldn’t fully comprehend the emotions that he was already feeling. Instead he let instinct take over and fiercely kissed Minhyuk as if his life depended on it, not letting the blonde have any say in the matter.

Though Minhyuk was likely to be surprised at first, he didn’t push Hoseok away or attempt to stop him. Hoseok pulled him closer, carefully holding the back of his neck as he deepened the kiss, seeing stars when he felt Minhyuk’s tongue brush against his own.

Feeling his face grew hot Hoseok pulled away from the kiss, needing to take a moment to compose himself. “Minhyuk, I–”

The blonde ran his thumb against Hoseok’s lips and smiled softly, his head cocked to the side as he looked at him. Hoseok wanted to say something but didn’t know what exactly he wanted to tell him. Instead, Minhyuk took the opportunity away from him as Hoseok felt Minhyuk kiss him again and he let the world slip away.


	6. Chapter 6

Minhyuk’s hair might have smelled like the mixture of honey, vanilla, and lavender, but his lips tasted vastly different. The complete opposite of Hoseok’s, which still had the aftertaste of nicotine and sweat. Minhyuk’s lips were thin but soft and Hoseok could feel the corners of his mouth curve upward into a smile while they kissed. He tasted like sweetness and mint–likely from gum that Minhyuk might have been chewing beforehand. He had been so distracted by attempting to decipher the taste of the blonde’s mouth that he didn’t notice Minhyuk’s hands wrap around his waist and trail up along his back.

Hoseok became lost in all of it. Minhyuk’s mouth, Minhyuk’s smell, Minhyuk’s hands roaming up and down his body. He could feel Minhyuk lean in closer to him as they kissed, his hand suddenly moving against his thigh–the sensation causing Hoseok to unnecessarily let out a small groan. Hoseok could feel the blonde smile against his lips and Hoseok pulled away, embarrassed.  

“Ah, sorry,” he mumbled, looking down and trying to hide a shy smile.

“There’s nothing to be sorry about,” Minhyuk replied, smirking. “Do you want to stop?”

“No, no,” Hoseok said, still embarrassed but trying not to show it.

Minhyuk replied by setting his hand under his hyung’s chin and lifting his head up to kiss him, the action itself causing Hoseok to let out another stifled groan.

“I didn’t know I did this to you, hyung,” Minhyuk teased.

“I don’t know _what_ you do to me, Minhyuk,” Hoseok replied before pulling the blonde into a deeper kiss.

Hoseok didn’t know what Minhyuk was doing to him. His emotional feelings for him were one matter, but this–this was something else. His pulse had quickened and his heart was beating so loudly that he could  practically hear it beating in his ears. The bedroom itself felt like it had become incredibly hot–the air around him thicker; the hair on his skin standing up straight. It was as if his senses were heightened and every little action that Minhyuk made sent a shiver down Hoseok’s spine.

Without even realizing it he had pulled the blonde into his lap, wrapping his arms around him as they kissed. He ran his hand through Minhyuk’s hair as he pulled away from his lips and began kissing his jawline and then his neck, biting and sucking his tan skin. Minhyuk moaned, the sound sending a shudder through Hoseok and into his groin, making him kiss him even more passionately. Hoseok gently tugged Minhyuk’s head back, his hand still wrapped in the blonde’s hair, sending intense kisses down his neck before sucking on his collarbone. As aroused as he was he did his best to be careful, not wanting to further harm Minhyuk’s injuries.

Minhyuk groaned, his hands wrapped around Hoseok and digging into him. Hoseok’s hands had worked their way up the back of Minhyuk’s shirt as he kissed him, feeling the younger boy’s skin prickle with goosebumps as Hoseok touched him. Hoseok finally pulled away from the crook of Minhyuk’s neck, now bruised and damp with saliva, before kissing him hard on the mouth. It practically knocked the breath out of Minhyuk, who moaned into the kiss and arched his back, grinding down into his hyung’s lap.

The sensation took Hoseok by surprise. Not because he’d never been intimate with someone before, but because this was different. This was _Minhyuk_. As taken aback as he was feeling the younger boy’s hips rocking down against his crotch, he cast the thought aside and hastily pulled away from the kiss before saying, “Take off your shirt.”

Minhyuk didn’t even hesitate. Though at first he blushed, the blonde did as he was told and removed his piece of clothing, tossing it on the floor behind them. Hoseok did the same, discarding his own garment and revealing his muscled flesh underneath. Hoseok couldn’t help but smirk as he noticed Minhyuk watching him, biting his bottom lip before meeting his hyung’s gaze. The older boy raised a brow quizzically, grinning cheesily before Minhyuk finally caught himself and looked away.

Hoseok chuckled and ran his fingers along Minhyuk’s bare skin, kissing his neck again as he let his hands roam his flesh. Although Minhyuk had a much smaller frame, more lean and lanky compared to the older, he was still quite fit. Hoseok trailed his fingers across Minhyuk’s chest and down his toned abdomen, licking and nipping at his skin. He cautiously avoided the bruises that were now purpling on Minhyuk’s side and set his hands on his hips, leaving welcomed, sensual marks on his skin as he kissed his neck.

“Mm, hyung,” Minhyuk cooed, pushing his hips back down against the older boy.

Hoseok couldn’t hold back a moan before kissing Minhyuk again, his nails digging into Minhyuk’s hips as he rocked down against him. A warmness had pooled in his groin and the fabric of his jeans were doing nothing to help the now aching erection that had formed beneath them. As the blonde rocked against him he only became more aroused, his lips now swollen from kissing Minhyuk so hastily. With his hands on Minhyuk’s hips he forced him to stop, biting his lip hesitantly after pulling away from their kiss.

“I want you,” Hoseok managed to say, his ears turning red after the remark.

“We don’t have to stop,” Minhyuk replied. He ran his hands over his hyung’s chest, lightly teasing his nipples before kissing his neck.

Hoseok let out a moan, his hands already practically down Minhyuk’s pants. Minhyuk continued to kiss him, being no less gentle to Hoseok’s neck as he nipped and sucked at his skin before running his tongue over Hoseok’s adam’s apple. Hoseok had managed to get his thumbs beneath the waistband of Minhyuk’s jeans but didn’t feel comfortable taking them off without asking first.

“Take them off, hyung,” Minhyuk whispered against Hoseok’s ear before teasingly sucking on his earlobe.

Hoseok didn’t need to be told twice–the sensation of Minhyuk’s breath and the dampness of his mouth against his ear caused him to let out another low moan. With Minhyuk still nipping at his ear he managed to unbutton the blonde’s jeans, ushering his hips up so that he could slide them down. As he pushed the younger boy’s jeans down to his knees he couldn’t stop his hands from grazing back up along Minhyuk’s warm thighs before resting on his ass. Teasingly, Hoseok gave him a squeeze, resulting in a groan from the blonde.

Hoseok lifted Minhyuk off of his lap with ease and maneuvered himself on top of him. He pulled Minhyuk’s jeans the rest of the way off and then tossed them to the floor before hovering back over him and kissing him hard on the mouth. Minhyuk moaned against him, his hands tangled in Hoseok’s dark hair as they kissed deeply; almost desperately. Hoseok pulled away from the kiss, daring to explore the rest of the blonde’s body as he kissed his way down his collarbone and chest, twirling light circles with his tongue against his stomach and nipping at his hips. Minhyuk was still in his boxer briefs, an obvious erection present beneath the fabric and Hoseok took the opportunity to lightly caress his lips over it. Minhyuk’s hips bucked up against him but Hoseok managed to still him with a hand on his hip, continuing to tease him.

Though Hoseok had never been intimate with a man before he thought he understood the basics of it. He’d watched enough porn to grasp the basic understandings of male intimacy, having been confused about his own sexuality for a number of years. He’d always been attracted to men just as much as he was attracted to women, but it wasn’t until he met Minhyuk that his feelings became more serious. Every little thing that Minhyuk did seemed to entice him more and more, but he’d been so nervous about societal views that he had suppressed his feelings to the best of his ability. Until now.

Minhyuk was writhing beneath him as Hoseok trailed his tongue over the cotton hiding the blonde’s aching erection, teasingly tugging at the waistband of his boxer briefs but not pulling them off.

“Hyung, _please_ ,” Minhyuk groaned, his back arching against Hoseok’s touch.

“Please, what?” Hoseok asked in a smirk, looking up at Minhyuk with his lips still against his crotch.

Minhyuk cursed, his toes curling and his hips desperately bucking up but Hoseok kept him still. Hoseok caught his eye as the younger boy looked down at him with heavy lids, looking drunk in arousal. “You know what,” he replied, his voice almost cracking.

“Mm, I don’t,” Hoseok replied as he pulled down Minhyuk’s boxer briefs, the blonde arching his hips so that Hoseok could take them off.

The cool air caused goosebumps to form on Minkyuk’s skin but it was Hoseok’s hand wrapping itself around his cock that caused him to moan and close his eyes, pressing his head back against the mattress underneath him. Hoseok licked his lips as he watched Minhyuk arch against his touch, relieved that his inexperience seemed to have a decent effect. Although he was still new to this he wanted nothing more than to please Minhyuk, forcing any hesitancy to the back of his mind.

As Hoseok stroked him he moved his head back down and ran his tongue against the tip of his cock before running his tongue down the shaft and back up again. Hearing Minhyuk gasp he took it as a good sign and took him into his mouth, lightly rubbing his tongue along the tip. Minhyuk moaned beneath him, a hand now wrapped in Hoseok’s hair as the elder took more of him into his mouth.  Although different than anything Hoseok had tasted before he was addicted to it; his own arousal throbbing in his jeans as he began to bop his head up and down.

Sucking Minhyuk off was not an easy task but Hoseok took his time, much to the dismay of the blonde who let out an intensely audible moan when Hoseok managed to take him fully into his mouth. Hoseok almost choked as Minhyuk thrusted his hips against him but managed to keep going, teasingly bobbing his head at an agonizingly slow pace. He pulled his mouth all the way out, lightly trailing his tongue along the shaft before taking him back in again, repeating this several times over. Minhyuk roughly clutched a fistful of Hoseok’s hair, his breathing ragged.

“H-Hyung stop,” Minhyuk stammered, unable to suppress a moan. “Ah, please. I don’t think I’ll last much longer if you don’t.”

Hoseok pulled away, leaving a warm coat of saliva on Minhyuk’s cock. He licked his swollen lips and swallowed, a sharp salty taste lingering in his mouth. With a new hunger in his eyes he continued to stroke Minhyuk beneath him, having not let go of the base of his cock. Minhyuk groaned again, his blonde hair sticking to the sweat on his forehead; his face flushed and hot.

“I thought you said we didn’t have to stop?” Hoseok asked sarcastically, continuing to slowly stroke him.

“I know, but ah-” Minhyuk groaned, unable to get a full sentence out as Hoseok caressed his thumb over the tip of his cock, rubbing small circles against it. “I want you, hyung. _Please_.”

Minhyuk sat up, pulling Hoseok into a fierce, desperate kiss. The kiss was sloppy from how aroused they both were but neither noticed, too focused on relieving the need that had built up within them. When they finally pulled away Minhyuk abruptly unzipped Hoseok’s jeans and set a hand inside them, stroking him affectionately against his boxer briefs. Hoseok’s head fell back and he let out a deep groan, his eyes fluttering shut. For a moment he became lost in the sensation of Minhyuk touching him–feeling as if he could drown in it. The elder managed to open his eyes, licking his lips as he looked back at Minhyuk in brief concern.

“I’ve never done this before,” he admitted. He would’ve blushed had his face not been so reddened already from arousal.

“You’ve never had sex before?” Minhyuk asked, smirking. He managed to slip his fingers through the hole in Hoseok’s boxer briefs and the immediate contact of the blonde’s hand against his skin caused Hoseok to shudder.

“Not with… a guy,” Hoseok gasped, his eyes briefly closing again.

If Hoseok’s eyes were open he would’ve been able to see the slight grin that played upon Minhyuk’s face, biting his bottom lip as he continued to stroke his hyung.

“I can teach you,” Minhyuk replied, leaning over to run his tongue against Hoseok’s bottom lip as he continued to stroke him.

Hoseok wanted nothing more than to take Minhyuk into his mouth and kiss him fiercely, but the protector in him made him think otherwise. “What about your injuries? I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Just shut up and kiss me, hyung,” Minhyuk replied, not waiting for an answer as he pushed his tongue into Hoseok’s mouth.

Hoseok moaned against him, holding the back of Minhyuk’s head as they kissed clumsily and full of need. The elder moved onto his knees and started to remove his pants as they kissed, forcing Minhyuk to withdraw his hand from its previous actions. Breaking from the kiss Hoseok pulled his jeans off and threw them aside, not bothering to look where they landed, before doing the same with his boxer briefs. In only a matter of seconds he was naked, pulling Minhyuk back into his lap to kiss him.

Minhyuk’s hand found its way back to Hoseok’s cock, a moan escaping from Hoseok’s throat as they kissed. The younger stroked him very slowly as Hoseok had done before, taking his time to caress the base before sliding his hand up along the shaft and teasing the tip with his thumb. Hoseok pulled away from the kiss and cursed, his head rolling to the side as Minhyuk continued.

“Do you want me?” Minhyuk asked, his lips against Hoseok’s ear. “Do you want me, hyung?”

“Ah, Minhyuk–” Hoseok moaned deeply, running his hands down the younger boy’s back before resting on his ass. “You have to tell me what to do.”

“Do you have any lube?” Minhyuk asked, nipping Hoseok’s ear. “Lube. Do you have any lube?”

“No, I don’t have anything like that,” Hoseok replied, gasping as Minhyuk gave him a light squeeze. Hoseok sighed–he didn’t have any condoms on him, either. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been intimate with somebody. It had been such a long time ago, and he never had the need to buy any sort of supplies, no matter what they were.

“We can do it the old fashioned way, then,” Minhyuk replied, removing his lips from Hoseok’s ear only to grab his hyung’s wrist instead. Hoseok was about to question him before the blonde took two of his fingers into his mouth, sucking on them thoroughly.

Hoseok attempted to suppress a moan, biting his bottom lip as he watched Minhyuk take his fingers into his mouth. Although he was sure it wouldn’t have felt as pleasurable as other things Minhyuk’s mouth might have been capable of doing, the sight in front of him was enough to make him weak. Minhyuk took his time to suck on Hoseok’s fingers, making sure they were thoroughly wet and coated with saliva before pulling away. Slowly he guided Hoseok’s wrist behind himself and towards his ass, and Hoseok understood what the younger was attempting to show him.

“Just one finger at a time,” Minhyuk stated, his face lightly flushing.

“Don’t worry,” Hoseok replied, kissing Minhyuk sweetly before doing what he was told.

Cautiously, Hoseok slid a finger inside Minhyuk’s entrance, pushing into him as slowly as possible. The blonde had set his hands on Hoseok’s shoulders, gripping them tightly as he straddled his elder’s lap. Hoseok paused for a few seconds before continuing to slide his finger all the way in, of which caused a groan to escape from the younger’s lips.

“Are you alright?” Hoseok asked, concerned.

“I’m okay; keep going,” Minhyuk replied.

Hoseok bit his lip, unsure if he should stop and call the whole thing off, but a small nudge from Minhyuk ushered him to continue. Hoseok slid his finger out slowly before pushing it back in, continuing the process a few times before picking up the speed slightly.

“You can add another,” Minhyuk said after a few minutes.

Hoseok listened to him like an attentive student, slowly sliding his second, middle finger with the first. Carefully, he moved his fingers fully into Minhyuk, who let out a short gasp. Hoseok stopped, now knowing to wait a few moments before continuing as Minhyuk became adjusted to the sensation. The younger’s arms were now wrapped around Hoseok’s shoulders; his head leaning on the crook of his neck.

“Okay,” Minhyuk stated.

“Are you sure, Minhyuk?” Hoseok asked.

“Please, hyung. I want this,” Minhyuk replied.

Hoseok slowly slid his fingers out and back in again, continuing to do the same as he had done before. He carefully picked up speed, curling his fingers as he did so, trying to stretch Minhyuk to the best of his ability. After a few more minutes Minhyuk’s grip around Hoseok’s shoulders tightened and he let out a soft moan, his hips bouncing back against his hyung’s hand.

“There, do it there,” Minhyuk stammered, gasping lightly.

Hoseok pulled his fingers out and pushed back in again, attempting to move them to the same spot that had made Minhyuk so flustered. Sliding his fingers all the way in and twisting them carefully, he was able to brush against something that caused Minhyuk to let out a pleasurable moan.

“A-ah, hyung,” Minhyuk said in a sigh, his nails briefly digging into the flesh of his hyung’s back.

Hoseok bit his lip, the sounds now emitting from the blonde sending shudders straight down into his aching erection. Biting his lip he concentrated on Minhyuk and Minhyuk alone, continuing to scissor his fingers in the exact way that seemed to make the younger boy convulse in pleasure.

“Add another,” Minhyuk said in a groan.

“Are you sure?” Hoseok asked.

“Yes, you have to,” the younger replied.

Before following Minhyuk’s direction Hoseok carefully removed his fingers and spit into his hand, the act itself disgusting but both boys paid no mind. With the extra lubrication Hoseok slid two fingers back into the blonde’s entrance and slowly began to add a third, the immediate tightness causing Minhyuk’s body to tense.

Hoseok kissed Minhyuk’s shoulder as the blonde tightened his grip around him, letting out slow breaths. The elder waited a few moments before continuing, pushing his fingers in at a steady pace so that he wouldn’t hurt him. When he had finally managed to slide all three fingers fully inside he pulled them out carefully and continued the process, waiting to see if Minhyuk’s reaction would change.

When Minhyuk’s grip around Hoseok had loosened he began to curl his fingers as he pushed them inside, picking up the pace and trying to find that same spot he had before. Pushing them fully inside and curling them upwards caused Minhyuk’s breath to hitch in his throat and he moaned. Hoseok smirked and moved faster, brushing his fingers against the same spot inside him, the action receiving another audible moan from the blonde.

“Does that feel good?” he asked, slowly sliding his fingers out and back in again.

Minhyuk replied in another groan, now rocking his hips down into Hoseok’s hand. Hoseok curled his fingers again just to tease him, and Minhyuk practically screamed in pleasure.

Hoseok couldn’t take it anymore. Assuming that Minhyuk was prepped enough he pulled his fingers out and spit into his hand one last time, coating the saliva on his cock. Minhyuk let out a disappointed groan when Hoseok had done so, his lips pouting.

“Okay, are you ready?” Hoseok asked, still ever-so-concerned.

Minhyuk answered for him by slowly lowering himself on Hoseok’s cock, the sudden intrusion causing his body to yet again tense. Although Hoseok knew that it must have been painful Minhyuk didn’t stop, cautiously sliding himself further down on his hyung as Hoseok lightly kissed his neck. Hoseok wanted nothing more than to fuck the life out of Minhyuk–the tightness enveloping his aching erection made him see stars–but he managed to control himself

When Minhyuk had fully lowered himself down onto him, Hoseok was ready to scream but suppressed it with a low moan instead, his fingers digging into Minhyuk’s hips. The blonde seemed to quickly adjust as he let out a throaty moan when Hoseok’s cock was fully inside of him.

“Hyung, you feel good,” Minhyuk groaned, grinding his hips further down onto Hoseok.

Hoseok moaned and replied by rocking his hips up against him and pulled Minhyuk into a desperate kiss. Minhyuk’s tongue claimed Hoseok’s mouth as he started to move against him, slowly pulling himself off of Hoseok’s cock before sliding back down. Hoseok groaned into Minhyuk’s mouth, breaking away from the kiss in order to bury his face in Minhyuk’s shoulder as the blonde picked up the pace.

“Shit, Minhyuk,” Hoseok exclaimed, breathing hard. The sensation was completely different than anything he had previously felt before. Minhyuk felt so tight around him and Hoseok felt like he was ready to burst.

Minhyuk briefly looked down at Hoseok and practically grinned as he fucked him–a snarky smile on his lips. He had his arms wrapped around Hoseok’s shoulders; his hands in his hair as he started to fuck him harder. Hoseok’s own hips rocked upwards to meet with Minhyuk’s every time he slammed downwards, the sound of skin slapping against skin and hot, rapid breathing the only audible sounds coming from the room.

“Do I feel good, hyung?” Minhyuk asked, his breath against Hoseok’s ear.

Hoseok had to close his eyes and concentrate in order to stop himself from coming too soon from the remark. Instead he cursed and mumbled Minhyuk’s name, burying his head against Minhyuk’s shoulder. Knowing he was close he wrapped one hand around Minhyuk’s leaking erection and began to stroke him, making Minhyuk toss his head back and moan. As Minhyuk picked up the pace Hoseok pumped him faster, his other hand gripping Minhyuk’s hip as he slammed down onto him.

“A-ah, I’m close,” Minhyuk stammered, his movements now becoming clumsy.

Hoseok stroked him faster and fucked him harder, all too desperate to reach climax. He cursed again when he felt Minhyuk suddenly tighten around him as he came, moaning his hyung’s name as he spilled into Hoseok’s hand. Unable to hold it in any longer Hoseok quickly followed suit, thrusting up into Minhyuk one last time as he came, moaning uncontrollably.

Minhyuk slumped on top of Hoseok after his climax subsided, his arms still wrapped around Hoseok’s neck and his hands tangled in his hair. Hoseok let out a mild groan; sweat stinging his eyes when he finally opened them. He released his hand around Minhyuk’s cock, wiping the come off on the bed before wrapping his arm around Minhyuk’s waist and holding him close. Neither of the bothered to move for a few moments despite the sensitivity Hoseok was feeling as his cock was still buried in the younger boy.

Finally Minhyuk carefully lifted himself off of Hoseok and fell back on the mattress, letting out a small groan that was mixed with both pain and pleasure. Although Hoseok still felt like he was coming down he tentatively leaned over Minhyuk and pushed his bangs away from his forehead and lightly kissed his face.

“Are you okay?” Hoseok asked, rubbing his thumb against Minhyuk’s cheek.

“Mm, more than okay,” Minhyuk replied in a small smile.

“I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

“Of course not,” Minhyuk replied in a light laugh. “Why are you always like this, hyung?”

“I don’t know, because I like you, I guess,” Hoseok replied, gently laughing.

“Oh yeah?” Minhyuk teased.

Hoseok sighed and shook his head, smiling. “Don’t make fun of me, Minhyuk. You know I’m not good at expressing my feelings.”

Minhyuk rolled his eyes. “Hyung?”

“What?” Hoseok asked.

“Just shut up and kiss me.”


End file.
